bilius | thallydraper | annperkins:

Aaron Paul & Aziz Ansari @ GQ’s 2011 “Men of the Year” Party (11/17/11)

OMG AZIZ MUST’VE BEEN SO EXCITED

 #HE EVEN CLOSED HIS MOUTH

sleepyjean | adamscott:

“I grew up in South Carolina. I think growing up down there has made me always kind of fascinated by red state thinking. Like, I don’t have a problem with gay marriage, but I love reading arguments against gay marriage. I find them really fascinating. This is my favorite one of all time, it’s from this guy named Senator John Cornyn, from Texas. This is his argument against gay marriage, I’m not making this up. He goes, ‘Now, if your neighbor marries a box turtle, that doesn’t affect your everyday life. But that doesn’t mean it’s right.’ What? What an interesting nugget of wisdom that is. Now, I myself was not a psychology major, but I think it’s pretty safe to assume at one point or another, Senator John Cornyn’s thought about makin’ love to a box turtle. ‘Cause, uh, I’m sorry, but that’s not the first animal you jump to, when you’re writing that analogy.” — Aziz Ansari

britta-perry:

Does this ever happen to you - like, I’ll sit in front of my computer to do some important work, and then I’ll just think “man. I wonder if Home Alone 2 made more money than Home Alone 1. I gotta look into this, now. Sorry important work, something more pressing has come up. It’s annoying, ‘cause what always happens is I’ll be researching one thing and I’ll see something else I want to look into. Like, for example, the Home Alone situation, I’ll see ‘oh wow, Joe Pesci’s in that movie. I don’t know much about Joe Pesci. Maybe I should learn everything about Joe Pesci!’ And I’ll spend hours doing this Joe Pesci research, and I know so much about Joe Pesci now, but it’s useless! It’s never going to help me! I’ve never heard of a story of like, a guy getting stopped in an alley by a dude with a knife like, “you’re gonna die tonight … unless you can tell me the name of the album Joe Pesci put out when he was a little kid.” “Little Joe Sure Can Sing.” “Damnit you’re free to go! I gotta stop integrating Joe Pesci trivia into my murders.”